The New SlumBlock Bloom of Lies

How's that for creating a title using five different movies, eh? Eh? I refer, of course, to the five latest movies I've seen - The New World, The Brothers Bloom, 16 Blocks, Slumdog Millionaire, and Body of Lies. These aren't necessarily new movies, in fact, they are all on DVD now, but these are the latest that I've seen that are new to me. I usually watch them while doing laundry, seeing as it's the only time I have for watching movies nowadays. Well, without any further ado, I present to you my review of The New SlumBlock Bloom of Lies!

The New World

Rotten Tomatoes' Score: 61%

My Score: 4.5/10

I can't say I went into this one with particularly positive expectations. The reason I watched it is because I am currently taking a U.S. history class and we recently talked about Jamestown, so I wanted to see something about it. From a historical perspective, I believe the film is rather accurate, but then again, what do I know about the details? Not much...

I'll start with the positive, which will go pretty quickly, and then I'll kinda tear it up. I think the best aspect of the film was the effort on the part of the filmmakers. It was apparent that they went to great lengths to make it look as authentic as possible from costumes, to sets, to even filming it within miles of the actual location. I think they successfully recreated 1607 Jamestown, which is quite an accomplishment. The other thing I liked also got on my nerves sometimes, and that's the music. James Horner (of Troy, A Beautiful Mind, and Mighty Joe Young, incidentally) composed the score, which plays a vital part in the film. I really like his music, and I certainly can't complain that there isn't enough of it in The New World. In fact, there is a bit too much. There are long periods in the film in during which only the music is heard and something dramatic is taking place. Now, there's nothing wrong with this in and of itself, but at these points, the music ends up extremely loud and repetitive, thus taking away from the moment. I felt like these parts of the movie would have been much better experienced listening to the live orchestra, and having the movie playing on a little screen on the stage.

And that leads me to what I didn't like. My #1 complaint would definitely be editing. The movie felt SO hacked up! It seriously felt like the director's five-year old son got a hold of the film and just went to town on it, making awkward cuts here and pasting it there. Now, one might argue that this editing is stylish, but style shouldn't confuse and piss off the viewer as he's trying to figure out what just happened.

My other main complaint is how boring it is. It was only my misplaced sense of duty that made me finish watching it, though I certainly didn't want to. It's really slow and to me, uninteresting. They focus A LOT on Pocahontas (though I noticed they never say that name in the movie) and her love interests (Collin Farrell and Christian Bale). It isn't even until an hour and a half into the movie that we finally see Christian Bale.

So, I can't help but wonder if I simply missed the point of the movie, because it seems like it should have been so much better. I can't really recommend it, though. Sorry, Mr. Bale, please don't get mad at me!

The Brothers Bloom

Rotten Tomatoes' Score: 62%

My Score: 8/10

I really enjoyed this one! I really like heist movies in general, and this did not let me down. It's about two brothers (Mark Ruffalo and Adrian Brody) who, from the time they were children, have always been running schemes to get money. Their theme is that everyone always gets what they want, even if it's not a remotely honest plan. We join them on one final scheme with Rachel Weiss as the target. Hilarity ensues.

This is one of those movies that constantly keeps you guessing as to who's playing whom, and what kind of tricks they have up their sleeves. Rachel Weiss's character is really funny. She plays a rich recluse without any social skills. I really don't want to say more about the film in fear of spoiling it, but I strongly recommend it. I might even buy it some day.

16 Blocks

Rotten Tomatoes' Score: 56%

My Score: 7/10

I wasn't intending on seeing this movie, but it was a pleasant surprise. It's actually a decent thriller. Bruce Willis plays a character that's so different from his usual roles. He is an old, worn-out cop who has a drinking problem. The character is quite pathetic, which is pretty cool to see since Willis usually plays the cool, confident hero. Mos Def plays a convict who is about to be a witness in a court, and Willis has to escort him to the courthouse, 16 blocks away. Pretty simple, huh? Yup. They walk down without incident to the courthouse, and the movie is over. It's about 15 minutes long - a decent short film. I jest...

As you can imagine, much intrigue ensues, and things don't go exactly according to plan. Mos Def's character is really annoying at first because of his voice, but you get used to it, and it's a rather enjoyable film. It wasn't one of my favorites or anything, but I would suggest a rental.

Slumdog Millionaire

Rotten Tomatoes' Score: 93%

My Score: 9.5/10

As you may be aware, this film won Best Picture this year by director Danny Boyle. In fact, you've probably seen it. I hadn't seen it, however, until about a week ago, but I loved it. It's an amazing story and it's told so uniquely. Though it has the potential to be quite depressing, the upbeat music keeps it light and fun. I really like Danny Boyle's movies so far (with only a slight exception of 28 Days Later), and this one did not disappoint. I'd really like to own Slumdog and see some of the special features. As far as the R rating is concerned, it was a very mild R movie. There is violence and some language (though most, if not all, is in a different language), but it's really not that bad. Or, maybe I'm just that desensitized to all that. Hmm...

Body of Lies

Rotten Tomatoes' Score: 51%

My Score: 8/10

I was really shocked to see Body of Lies receive a 51% on Rotten Tomatoes after I saw it. I thought it was really well made. It takes place in the Middle East, and so it is all about the unrest and violence there. Leonardo DiCaprio plays a government agent who lives there and is constantly under fire, while Russel Crowe plays the head of the Middle Eastern affairs in D.C. I'm not sure how straight my facts are there, so if I messed some of that up, which I probably did, then you can just GET OFF MY BACK!

I'm not sure this was the intention of the film, but it made me consider studying Arabic. There's a lot going down over there, and the politics are really interesting. It made me want to know more about what's going on in that area of the world. I didn't realize it was a Ridley Scott film until afterwards, so it wasn't quite up to par with other films he's made (I'm a pretty big Ridley Scott fan). I would definitely recommend it, though. There's obviously pretty strong violence in it, but the main thing to watch out for is language. It was rather pervasive. So, if that's really not your cup of tea, and you don't have Clearplay, then maybe this one isn't for you.

Well, there you have it, folks. It's now time for a little game. The challenge is to come up with a storyline for The New SlumBlock Bloom of Lies. It doesn't have to be long; it can merely be a synopsis. Just put it in a comment after this post. Now, for the prize. I will make an audio trailer based on the best plot submitted, and I'll include it in the next post, along with your name and something very, very personal about you! Good Luck!